The Depression phase feels like an all consuming and endless amount of mental, emotional, and physical pain. It will have you questioning your existence. Why am I here? You will question your feelings. Do I deserve to be happy? You will question your own judgement. It was all my fault. I let this happen. Your self worth will be brought to the forth front, because life as you know has reach a new low and there is no way you can recover from this moment. In spite of this, you can recover from it, if you set your mind towards forgiveness and acceptance. Embracing your new reality, instead of cursing it, will open the door of a newly found freedom.
How long does it last? The depression phase can last for as long as you want it too. Seriously, you have the mental power to turn on or off depression. However, studies have shown that it can last from a few weeks to a lifetime. It all depends on you doing the work. You have to go through the emotions while holding on to your sanity. I will explain it further in detail as you keep reading.
How to overcome it? Here are a few tips to get you started on the most difficult part of your journey:
Tip #1: Give yourself Permission to Cry. Let go and let it out. It hurts. Breakups are unexpected, devastating and gut-wrenching. It leaves you hopeless, confused and abandoned. That’s why crying releases toxins from within your body. It’s metaphorically connecting you to your spiritual self. Some people can recall opening up old wounds from their past, while being in their present state of pain. By mending the past, it allowed them to heal those old wounds and move on.
Tip #2: Listen to sad music… until you can’t anymore. Many psychologists agree that going through heartache, by listening to music, helps on the journey to acceptance. While creating your Adele mix, add a few upbeat songs, as well. Upbeats songs like, Christina Aguilera, Stronger; or Beyoncé, Irreplaceable. You want to go through your emotions but not dwell on it for too long.
Tip #3: Keep yourself busy. Remember that book you’ve been putting off? What about that hobby you wanted to do? Or that friend you forgot to call back–a month ago? Now is the time to connect with your former self.
Tip #4: Talk to love ones. Family or Family-like friends will always be there for you. And if your family doesn’t understand, seek a Therapist. And if you can’t afford a Therapist, google SoloEssential.com and click it (wink). Just know that you are not alone in your journey to singlehood.
Remember you are Important, Smart, and a Fighter!
If you follow these tips each day, you should begin to see the changes form within you. You may feel lighter, more inspired to try new things and most importantly, embracing your new way of living. Now your ready to move on to the next Phase–Acceptance.
Continue to Five Phases of Single: Acceptance